Another Update

Well, I guess that recovering from major surgery follows more a logarithmic curve than a linear or exponential one. I seem to have gained back what I lost from traveling, but not much more than that. Early on in the recovery I became accustomed to giant leaps forward everyday. So now that I'm taking smaller steps, the pace seems snail-like. I've really spent the past week at my Mom and Gary's concentrating on trying to do nothing but get better. I've slowly come to realize, though, that concentrating on one's recovery can be frustrating and painful. If I try to get out and do something, it takes my mind off of things. I don't think about the pain in my leg or abdomen. And then when I get home, I seem to feel a little bit better. Now don't get me wrong. I'm not ready to go basejumping just yet, but I think getting outside or cooking or simply being happy will go a long way towards my recovery.

And what better place to be outside and ground myself than Colorado? We've had several days over 70 degrees since I've been home. I've even managed to get a couple of minor sunburns. Whoa, whoa, whoa...now, you're probably saying: "What is this cancer survivor doing getting sunburns!?!" Well, cancer is not something that I'd like to have again, but I have a newfound respect for the randomness of the disease and the importance of enjoying life. Those of you who know me know that I strive to take very, very good care of my body. After all of that and getting cancer at 23, I have to say...take all of that "carcinogen this"..."prevents cancer that" with a grain of salt. All that you can really rely on is statistics and your own happiness. So, take a deep breath, relax, eat a few pesticide-infused, genetically engineered Strawberries, and wash 'em down with some tasty hormone-added milk. You'll probably be ok.

Right now I'm sitting at Dad's house looking out over perfectly blue skies with a clear view for at least 70 miles. There's a big Jay eating sunflower seeds off of the feeder on the deck. The deer are lounging just off of the back deck. In short...bliss. Just being up here makes me feel better.

So, what have I been up to? Well, to be honest: not much. On Tuesday I went to see Tichy, my acupuncturist of many, many years. We hadn't seen each other since late high school. So, we had a lot to catch up on, cancer notwithstanding. He got the full update, and said, "so, what do you think caused this?" Before I even went into the trials and tribulations of my life during the first part of medical school, Tichy explained that, in Eastern medicine, the testicles are in the "Earth" channel. The Earth channel has to do with feeling grounded, which can be anything from literally being grounded into the earth, to home, to relationships, to practicing one's passions. Considering that I left my home behind to go across the country to medical school, broke up with my ex, had a roommate that hated me with a passion, felt like I had no home, latched onto Teresa in an unhealthy way, moved, and so on, it seems no surprise that I ran into some problems with my Earth channel. Still, (and this is the really amazing part) the reason that all of this happened is both cause and solution. Sure, cancer sucks, but now I have the opportunity to go back to Dartmouth and put in some roots in a really healthy way. That has been clear to all of us from outset. Seeing Tichy only offered even more clarity on the subject. According to Tichy, my energy pulses weren't too misaligned, which is surprising given everything that has happened. Still, I did feel a shift within myself a couple of weeks ago when my anxiety levels dropped dramatically. Leaving Tichy's, my head felt immediately clearer. If nothing else, the acupuncture does have a noticeable impact on my clarity of mind. Afterwards, I felt so good that I just had to celebrate the beautiful weather. I went to Washington Park and walked for nearly an hour in bare feet. The people watching, but especially the dog watching, was superior. I hate the sprawl of Denver, but its funny how comforting home can be. I returned home feeling renewed, though the feelings of boredom and frustration returned after a day or two.

Other than that, no major events to report. On Thursday, I picked up some new brake levers for my bike and spent some time browsing around Littleton Cyclery. It was nice to fondle some super expensive bikes and talk with the guys there for a bit. I picked up a 14 pound Orbea and saw the new Dura Ace for the first time. It was beautiful, but nothing can justify a 450 dollar chainring. And as cyclingnews reported, the shifts did feel somewhat muted. Yesterday afternoon, I hopped in the car and drove up to Dad's. I cooked dinner for everyone: Chili with fresh avacado, cherry tomatoes, cheese, and Barry's gremolata (lemon/garlic/parsley paste). It felt great to be up and moving around and doing something that I love. Kristen called during dinner prep to invite me to a game night in Boulder. So, I headed down around 8:30. I finally got to meet Ryan, Kristen's boyfriend, though it was very brief. Kristen, Kyle (Ryan's roommate), Giuseppe (Kristen's roommate), and I played Cranium and Taboo for several hours. It was really, really great to have some fun with some young people. We had a great time. So, thank you for that you guys.

No pics this time, but here are the california raisins singing with claymation Ray Charles: